Saturday, October 15, 2005
~Right or Wrong?~
Somethings some see it as right, some wrong..Should everyone be given a chance to explain? i was just dreaming that there was such thing as a short time interval, something like 10mins for people to juz sit down and think through tings? good idea? hope so..
Yesterday, my mind was a wreck..kept having to think whether to skip a meeting and watch movie or exercise or crash tjc or be a good girl and go for the meeting..as usual i chose the 1st idea..then it was choosing of movie..parents wun approve me in watching scary movies, since i have selective memory which permanently keeps the pic of scary scenes and somehow keep having recurring nightmares..so yea im banned from these movies, with the exceptions of listening to fren's narration of the show..haha..So cher, xp, jason and i watched "the wig"..i admit, i kept my feet up..for 2 reasons..1. when im scared, i curl up.. 2. i was feeling cold..there was occasional screams and frequent covering of eyes*embarrassed* but hey that was my 1st scary movie kays.hehe..last time it was always watched at home, with lightings and the usage of a remote control..hehe..we managed to crash tjc open house..hehe..met many old friends..miss them alot!! hehe.. was offered a ride home by sandy, as she was having tkd and i was having jap classes..but turned down as i felt it wasnt nice to accept and also what about cher and friends..so oh well..figured i shall go home by bus..but in the end, maybe accepting the ride would be good, at least i wun get disturbed by jason and his pic of rong pu' hair..But the night ended quite well, i slept well, because God was by my side as always..
Was looking forward to today since the idea of blading came about.But had overseas cip meeting, in which we had to go door to door to inform residents about our newspaper collection, worse was 2 person was assigned to 10 HDB blocks which has 16 storeys..had to multitask, slotting leaflets in gaps, talking to residents, msging wake up msgs, and trying to find a comfortable time for all to blade..whew..thank goodness my dad was able to fetch me home and to the beach for blading, i think i seriously need more exercise and sleep, slept throughout the journey home and to the beach, Is napping good? if i didnt nap, would i not be in such a crappy mood? dunno, but it sure make me miss my bed..hurried to beach in the end, actually it was daddy that hurried as he knew i was rushing, haha..todays probably the 1st time i decided on clothes and got dressed that quickly, with the help of mummy reminding me about safety, checking i had everything..
thought everything would be great, was actually hoping for it to be great.. trying not to be too quiet or moody..no point spoiling others' moods right..but failed in the end, dunno why things just magnify itself..like tiny things could become something big..was abit moody knowing friends left without me, sorta felt upset as i missed out the fun time in Vjc..felt worse knowing friends got lost and walked 50mins in the wrong direction..it was like damn, i should have hurried and go down to vjc asap, then probably would have caught up with them, or they just wait a little abit more, so they wun get lost, and both parties wun need to walk down and up..hai..i shldnt have let myself feel anything about them leaving 1st, i made them wait, so what can i do..
gotta kinda irritated with the noisy background when talking on the phone..on normal days, i would probably just ask the other party to cover the mouth piece, so that only his voice could be heard..but today it was "shut up"..feeling so exhausted, tried to think whether to ask des to come to the midway distance between mac and friends, tried to think whether to go find friends, tried to picture the whole beach, finding the location of friends..but multi-tasking aint good at such situation i guessed..hai..in we met halfway..des's tiredness may have rubbed off on me, or simply i was moody to start of with..was my face black? wished i had a mirror to see it..its just me..to keep quiet when angry, pissed, tired, upset or irritated..Thanks cher, for offering the muffins, xp and cheng for trying to communicate with me..and if i sorta ignored anyone..sorry, was just trying to get back to normal by shutting out everything..said somethings that are wrong..or phrased wrongly..i think i should have calm down before talking, probably would have handled the situation better..But things got back to almost normal, we had our blades after lunch..and i seriously felt better after blading and some laughters= ) love gliding without having to move the feets, effortlessly..oh well,i feel i should apologise to all that waited, sorry guys, and to those who felt my moodiness..sorry..
seriously miss the sun, canoe, kayak, volleyball, rollar blading, ice skating, the sea and being the happy me..
was i affected because he saw me yesterday and tried to contact me, but i only knew after 30mins, missing the chance to hear his voice, see him in the flesh, and the chance to tell him i love and miss him badly..and that he was the only one that i felt safe when watching anything disturbing..hai..
Right or wrong, i shall work harder to make sure my days would get better and not worse, by keeping a positive attitude and being more observant to my phone, so i wouldnt upset anyone and wouldnt miss the chance to see him..
But for now, at least tonight, i shall just watch "full house" and let myself day-dream..figured no one would read this blog..so oh well..shall end here
~things can get better right? pls say yes ~
she told
the story ...
9:47 PM
